Celebrating holidays as a divorced parent when you have kids can be a bitter pill to swallow. Divorce and a fractured family is never an easy situation to be involved in but the most important thing in all of this is your children’s best interests and that both parents get to spend time with the children.
Just because you and your former spouse are divorced, it does not mean that you can’t both get access to the children during these important periods. The important thing is that things remain amicable between both of you despite any differences you may have so that your children’s best interests are preserved.
However, the thought of managing a situation like this probably seems impossible at the moment. So in this post, we’re going to give you five tips on how you can celebrate the holidays post-divorce and still spend time with your children.
- Spend Just The Holidays Together
If things aren’t atrocious between you and your former spouse, then perhaps it can be arranged that during important holidays like Christmas, Easter, Thanksgiving, and others you can actually spend those days together.
If the relationship is on good terms, then you may be able to spend the day at your former spouse’s place during the day on important family holidays.
It’s great if this kind of arrangement can be organised but understandable that not all parents will have such an amicable relationship.
- Alternate The Holidays
If even spending holidays together as a family is not possible then a great way to give both parents equal time with the children on holidays is to alternate them. For example, perhaps your former spouse will have the children during Easter for one year and the next year, you can have them.
This works great for all important holidays like Christmas and any others, and gives both parents an equal amount of holiday time with the kids.
- Share The Holidays
Holidays periods like Easter, for example, last for a few days so during holidays, a reasonable approach is to split the children’s time between residences.. You could have the children for the first part of the Easter weekend and then your former spouse could have them for the second half of the weekend.
This can be a great arrangement for both parents because it means that one parent will not have to experience the disappointment of not seeing their kids at all during important holidays. This also works for shorter holidays like Thanksgiving for example. Your children could spend lunch with you and then they could go back home for dinner.
You can apply this approach to all important family holidays no matter where in the world you live.
- Keep Your Children Involved
It’s crucial that you don’t keep your children boxed out of anything that’s going on. This is even more relevant if they are young children that may not really understand why you and your partner divorced, and not know what to make of it.
The important thing is to communicate with them and never close them off. Let them know what is going on so they don’t feel alienated from the both of you. Remember, children want to feel noticed and understood and if you don’t tell them what’s going on then, they may end up falsely thinking something is their fault.
Give your children a voice and reassure them that everything will be okay.
- Communicate With Each Other In Advance
Hopefully, things aren’t so bad between the two of you that you can’t even communicate amicably with each other regarding holidays and your children. The key to making this whole messy situation work without turning ugly is to communicate with each other, ideally in advance if you have any plans.
For example, if you’ve got something special planned for Easter this year, perhaps you’ve got extended family coming around that you don’t see often then tell your former spouse in advance. Making plans at the last minute without consulting your former spouse is guaranteed to trigger fireworks.
Whatever the situation is, amicable communication is a must regarding post-divorce holidays with your children.
We know that post-divorce holidays are a tough situation to be in for children and parents. However, the key is to remain amicable throughout so that both parents can still spend quality time with the children during the holidays.
Children in any family need both parents and it’s only fair that both parents get to see the children during holidays. Maintain honest communication with your former spouse and your children, and you’ll be able to strike up a reasonable arrangement that keeps both parents and more importantly the children, satisfied.
If you’d like some more personalised advice in this area then don’t hesitate to get in touch with us.